For All We Know

The intimacy scares me. I don't know what it is, but it's probably because it's so unknown to me... I can't imagine being so much more closer to anyone than close friends. The idea of being touched physically at all... is uncomfortable. The actual action is not so much so, but that doesn't mean I don't get nervous, since I don't know what to do or say -- restraint is something that is ingrained for me.

Not to mention that the hardest thing to me is seeing people look at me. That probably bothers me the most, since I can't really trust my friends to /not/ react. Restraint is easier than facing the consequences.